The Life Journey of a Nobody

The images were blurred. I could't discern anything. The atoms forming the molecules scattered here and there. My fingers tried to touch any particle they could reach. Nothing, nothingness, complete darkness barred my way. I shouted. My voice reverberated in the darkness. "Did you hear me?" silly me asking question to nothingness. It's there; I saw it, yet it's beyond the reach of my senses. I could see nothing. I could feel nothing, I could taste nothing. I could smell nothing. I could only hear my voice in the void. The noisy darkness.

Silence. I only heard cars passing by and the humming of the machine keeping this house intact. The students already left the town, for holidays. They will be back soon swarming campus's buildings and parks with their noise--the noise that now I am longing for. My mind is busy thinking of this and that, those things and these things, things completed and not yet completed.  Silence.  All around me it's silence. I heard my brain playing the cassettes of memories, calling people by their names. I miss them. I miss them so much. This silence punctuates my longing for the loved ones. For the husband whose love gives endless warmth, I miss you. For the mother whose endless prayers accompany me always, I miss you. For the father whose silly love makes me laugh, I miss you. For the sisters whose words may sometimes be nice and some other times be harsh, I miss you. For the friends who love hanging out with me, I miss you. For all the food awakening my taste buds, inviting my saliv

It's really difficult to admit that you are a shopaholic. Speaking of which, I am. Well, I meant I almost turned to be one--nearly there. God, that is awful. I have been shopping dresses too much, or so I thought. But, well, I always have reasons for buying those dresses. I need them. Yes, I do. See, excuses are so easy to find. I can even find a thousand excuses for my spending. But, to be honest, I am pretty sure I haven't been a shopaholic, yet. I've told you, I was almost there. Other proofs to be sure I'm not: I never spend too much money on dresses, or shop too frequently that I couldn't buy other necessary stuffs, or be attacked by high fever when I could't get the dress that I wanted. On top of all, I knew how to stop. So, here I am, promising myself to stop shopping those darn cute dresses for good. I promised myself to specifically stop visiting this particular website that has been my favorite for dress shopping since May this year. I won't tell y

So, I failed I lost I was defeated I was torn No, I don't give up I thrust forward I'm guarded by a wide wooden wall My flame still burns Inside, the fire is waiting Count me on  I'll be there Again Ditulis saat menelan kekecewaan karena sebuah kegagalan :)